Labrynna-Day 1

It called to me: "Accept our quest, Hero!" and I could feel it pulling me. The Tri-Force had tugged me to where I needed to go as a hero. I landed and immediately heard a yell for help. I run up a frame to find a woman being molested by octoroks. They fled as I approached. The woman told me she was waiting for me. That she was the nurse of Princess Zelda, Impa and that the octoroks fled because they saw the tattoo of the triforce and knew that I was a Hyrulean Hero (Who wouldn't flee from ME? Pssh). She needed to find a singer named Nayru (Why a nurse needs a singer I didn't know but, whatever)

We finally found her in a clearing singing to a bunch of animals (damn hippy... You can tell by her Gypsy clothes and long hair => )




Along with Nayru was a man named Ralph. He was an ass. He said he knew we would come because "A little birdy told him" (What kind of faggot talks to birds?) and also because he could feel some evil coming... but that he didn't need my help to defeat it! (Hello! Ganon, Ganondorf, Skull Kid... What evil monsters have YOU defeated?!?!) Unfortunately before I could flip the dude the bird and leave Impa started cackling like a mad woman. Then a spirit appeared from her and gave a long speech. Something about time and darkness. (I'm a pro at this, so I just stared at some birds in the distance. You can only hear someone say "I'm evil and I'm going to destroy the world" so many times before it just all blends together) When I had woken from my ADD induced trance Ass was wanting to kill the spirit but she was possessing Nayru so Ass would kill the spirit but lose Nayru. So he didn't.

The spirit, whose name was Veran, created a portal and jumped into it. Ass explained how Nayru never knew she was the Oracle of Ages and how it was his responsibility to protect her. (Smooth move Exlax) He ran away. Side note: he runs like a girl.

I went over to Impa who had recovered from being possessed she told me I needed to go talk to the Maku Tree in the east and gave me a wooden sword. So I headed out chopped some bushes and octoroks (Who didn't run away this time) and made my way into a town.


^ I draws picture ^

I found my way to this huge tree called the Maku Tree. It was going to give me something to defeat the evil (Alright! Easy street here I come!) but then the tree starts going bananas and says that Veran was messing with stuff in the past (Oh, was that what evil spirits with time traveling abilities do?) and disappeared before she could give me what I needed ( :( Bye Bye Easy Street...) There was only a swamp left. So I went through it and found Ass telling me to jump into the time portal with him. (Oh so NOW he needs my help) I just wanted to get out of this hippy town so I jumped in after him.

-Link